Saturday, May 26, 2007

Round and Round We Go

Some things in life just seem to keep repeating over and over. Do we never learn from getting burnt? Why do we continue to do what we know so much better not to do? Why do we keep making the same mistakes and fuckups again and again and again?

Perhaps the lesson is not to learn from the mistake but, instead is to learn from a lifetime of repeating the same one over and over. Like the beat in a song and inseparable from the song, it continues until the song is over.

What if what is being learned is not getting the lesson? If you ever got it, you would not have gotten it. Perhaps it is not a lesson, only a song we must sing, a dance we must dance. When we get past and outside the right and wrong of it, the good and bad, the happy and sad of it; then we will be able to see and hear the show on the stage on which we play.

What is it like to never be able to sing on key or play an instrument and love music like nothing else in life? What is it like to find one’s soul mate only to find you are not theirs and never find another? What is it like to be born unable to walk and dream of running a marathon? Perhaps in our oneness, each of us has a part similar to these questions to live. Through each of our individual lives, the whole that is all of us, will know intimately; what it means to be without and what it really means to have the gifts we do have. Since those that are without will know the value of what those who have have; even if those that have don’t.

When we look at everything in our lives from our perspective, so much of it makes no sense at all. It is often unfair, cruel, stupid, senseless, selfish and miserable. No matter how much we “know” better, knowing makes not the least bit of difference in what we do. Just maybe there is a deeper knowing and a much larger perspective, that we don’t see that does make sense of it all.

Perhaps or perhaps everything is just really fucked.

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